One thing that I would like to emphasize now, I HATE COUGHING!

seems like Pi Pa Gao is no longer effective, its so uncomfortable coughing every now and then.

yes, even during my sleep! super irritating.

Moreover, today's weather is like soooooooo cold!

.

Anyway, today's work is terrible to the max.

and my mood drop to the lowest after work ended..

hence, I am so gonna take a break and have a good rest at home later((:

Umm it has been eons since I last slacked at home...

But I am all prepared, have downloaded several NintendoDS games. Moreover, I havent been spending time with mybaby for like sooo long already..

OMG! I AM WAITING FOR GARDENING MAMA TO BE OUT!!

Holyshit. Cooking mama is like the nicest ds game of all, so Gardening mama should be nice too!

cant wait cant wait cant wait=DDD

On top of that, I had dinner with Sis and her husband @ Bliss Restaurant on Sunday's night.

(the restaurant which is located in the middle of the Punggol Park)

am pretty satisfied with the main course, together with the ambience, thumbs up!

In other words, they asked me out to lecture me. Hahahah, I meant very very close chats lah.

.

One thing which hurts me the most is that, I have received very negative remarks from my dad about me. He is already near to giving up on me, imagine someone who dotes on me so much is gonna do that to you. I am sure you'll feel the same way as me. I regretted for being such a bad daughter, spending most of the time out of the house, especially the amount of time I have spent on clubbing last week. Because I knew that he will be very mad at me,so I choosed to keep it from him and not telling him that I wont be going home. Fyi, my dad will get dinner for me every week days, but sometimes, I really have to admit that I totally forgotten to give him a call to not buy my dinner despite repeating to myself for several times. It wasnt what I meant, so I have no choice but to throw the packet of food away, he knows bout it thats why he was even more furious. I understand, imagine you were the one who spent money buying dinner, then the person just keep throwing it away.. Moreover, I dont initiate, I dont start the ball rolling if you know me well enough. Thats why my relationship with my dad is like tone down so much these days. It hurts, cause altho he doesnt show, I know deep inside, he cares and dotes on me!

Not only that, I dont know how the hell my family members knows every single thing bout me, even my relationships(perhaps they are stalking my blog right now!). When it comes to bgr, I was never a strong girl. Yes, I almost tears when I mentioned my situation to them cause it hurts so much inside. I doubt no one really understand me.. I admit that I used to cry on the phone to my friends every now and then, so often that they got so used to me crying, but not anymore. I dont call them up and cry like a crybaby, unless things really force me to an end. Its like very rare now, I am glad but still, they seems to bottle me up. For the time being, I really hate myself. for creating so much unhappiness causing myself to end up at this state. I hate myself, for losing so much till I dont even know myself well now. I wonder if things will turn out to be fine for me soon? cause if my dad is suppose to give up on me,I can actually jump down of the building already. As for bgr, I do not wish to stress myself for the time being. How do I love someone before I even learnt how to love myself? All the truth that you've revealed to me a moment ago, if only I knew it long ago, its hurting me so much now. I hate myself crying so badly in my room. I am on my nerves of breaking down...

Can I not be a strong girl for a day?